Consistent Life Ethic
Wikipedia offers the following definition:
The Consistent Life Ethic is an ethical, religious, and political ideology based on the premise that all life is sacred.[1] The ethic’s adherents are opposed to abortion, capital punishment, assisted suicide, economic injustice, and euthanasia. Adherents are opposed, at the very least, to unjust war, while some adherents also profess pacifism, or opposition to all war. Some also extend the concept of a “consistent ethic of life” to encompass animal rights and vegetarianism.
Tips For Raising Children In A Multicultural World
- Be a role model of appreciation and respect for differences – Children learn what is socially acceptable by watching and listening to the important adults in their lives. That’s you! When your child sees you respecting differences among people, he will grow to do the same.
- Understand that young children notice differences – Don’t be embarrassed by your child’s observations or questions. As adults, we may cringe as our preschooler says out loud, “Why can’t that man walk?” From a very young age children notice differences without placing a value judgment on what they observe. Answering questions in a matter-of-fact way encourages them to explore and accept differences. They will learn it is okay to ask about differences if it’s done in a respectful way.
- Celebrate your family’s traditions – Celebrate and teach your child about his culture and his family’s values and traditions. Learning about his family’s background helps him understand his own unique identity. When you practice cultural traditions you are making memories your child will treasure for a lifetime and creating a special bond you both can enjoy.
- Enjoy music, books, toys and art from different cultures – Play a lullaby from a different land for your baby, give your toddler a unique toy from another culture, or read a folktale from a different part of the country to your preschooler. Talk about the differences and similarities you see or hear, and show your child how much you value diversity.
- Go to a different neighborhood to play or eat lunch – Seek out parts of your area where people from diverse backgrounds live. Have a casual conversation with another family on the playground or other public place. Your child will see human diversity as a part of everyday life if he is exposed to a variety of people and environments.
About Parents as Teachers National Center
Pat Simpson joins the MOMbo TV community from Parents As Teachers. Based in St. Louis, Parents as Teachers National Center is the resource base and backbone of Parents as Teachers, a parent education and early childhood development program serving parents throughout pregnancy until their child enters kindergarten, usually age 5. The nonprofit National Center oversees more than 3,000 programs offering Parents as Teachers services nationwide as well as in several other countries. For more information about Parents as Teachers, visit www.ParentsAsTeachers.org.
In Due Season
Today my daughter picked a tomato. Earlier this summer, we planted a wide variety of seeds in our patio container garden. The tomatos were an heirloom variety, small, orange and especially sweet. After tasting a few of these last year, I embarked on an educational gardening project with my daughter Abigail.
Gardening for me has been a humbling experience. I realize that I am completely incapable of making anything grow. I can find good soil, plant seeds, water diligently and prune. I can try to keep harmful pests and diseases away and can add a bit of fertilizer to give the plants a boost. I did all of these things because I could. There were, however, things that I could not do.
I could not ensure that our tomatos would grow or that they would be sweet. Nor could I rush the process. The seeds had to germinate before they became seedlings. The seelings had to grow before they could produce flowers and only after they flowered would tomatos appear. That’s the way it was.
Every other day, Abigail would ask if the tomatos were ready to be picked. ‘No Abigail,’ I would say, ‘We have to wait until they turn orange.’
Gardnening this summer has been a test of patience. Each and every day, I I have been reminded to appreciate the various stages of growth. My daughter learned about plants. I learned more about her. Stages of development are what they are. They are all necessary for healthy growth.
My daughter picked a tomato today…and yes, it was very sweet.
‘To everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven.’ Ecclesiastes 3:1
Win A $100 Eternal Creation Gift Certificate!
What You Can Win: One lucky winner will receive a $100 Eternal Creation Gift certificate.
How To Win: Simply visit the Eternal Creation website and take a look at all of the adorable outfits. Come back and post a comment–telling us how you would use the $100.
Contest Rules: All entries must be received by September 15, 2008. You must have a valid email address so that we can contact you if you win. We will post the names of the winners here, so be sure to check back.
And the winner of the $100 Eternal Creation gift certificate is……….Brighid Murphy. Congratulations Brighid!
Win A Zoobie!
What You Can Win:
Two winners will each receive a cudly super-soft Zoobie pet of their choice!
How To Win:
Simply visit the Zoobies website and take a look around at all of the animals. Come back and post a comment here at MOMbo TV.com, telling us why your child would like to have a new Zoobie pet. You must have a valid email address (not published) so that if you are selected, we can notify you.
Contest Rules:
All entries must be received by September 15, 2008. We will post the names of the winners here, so be sure to check back!
And the two winners are…….Aimee Wheaton and Sabra. Congratulations!!
Win A Copy of the Showy Show Preschool Show!
What You Can Win: Two winners will each receive a copy of the Showy Show! Preschool Show DVD.
How To Win: Simply visit the Showy Show! website and take a sneak peek. Come back and post a comment–telling us why your little superstar should win a copy of the Showy Show! DVD.
Contest Rules: All entries must be received by September 15, 2008. You must have a valid email address so that we can contact you if you win. We will post the names of the winners here, so be sure to check back.
And the two winners are……..Maria Crudup and Priscilla B. Congratulations!!
A Meditation For Mothers
I heard a wise teacher give a talk today on the subject of idolatry. ‘An idol,’ he said, ‘was anything that caused us to divert our attention away from God.’ An idol could be a person, a passion, an ambition or a possession. With humility, he confessed that even in his own church, idolatry was a problem.
Reflecting on the ancient text Psalm 115, the teacher shared a story of worldwide travel and meaningful interactions with people from a wide variety cultural backgrounds. Idols of wood, stone, bronze and gold….he had seen them all. But nowhere in the world, he said, had he seen more idol worship than in the United States of America. The god of materialism competes for our attention…often winning…diverting our attention away from the one who gives us life.
As a mom, I could not help but think about subtle idolatry and the ways in which materialism can drive our parenting decisions. Whether it is the never-ending obsession with making sure that our children have ‘the latest and greatest’ toys…..or allowing ‘earning potential’ to be the sole determinant when broaching the subject of college admissions and majors….our heartfelt desire to provide the best can easily divert our attention (and our children’s attention too) away from a posture of thankfulness and the unique purpose that God has for their lives.
Just something to think and pray about this week……
Are You An Artsy Mama?
Mandy Ray-Jones is the creator of Artsy Mamas, an organization that encourages moms to unleash their artistic potential. Mandy will be joining the MOMbo TV community as a featured contributor. I had a chance to interview Mandy for an episode of the Radio Mom Show. Here is a transcript of the interview…..
KI: Mandy, when I finally had a chance to visit your website and read a little bit about Artsy Mamas, I thought that what you were doing there in Murfreesboro was something that mothers in other parts of the country—or the world, for that matter—could draw inspiration from. What was your inspiration for creating Artsy Mamas?
MJ: Well, I was inspired by a variety of things. Most of all, I am an actor and a writer, and I found that as a mom it’s been very difficult for me to find an opportunity to find a vehicle for those types of endeavors, considering all the diaper changing, breastfeeding, and all those other fun things you do when you’re a mom. So I basically had an incident where I really wanted to go to an audition and at the last minute I couldn’t because my husband was sick and the kids needed someone to watch them, so I started thinking wouldn’t it be really cool if there were a place where I could go to do my art and other moms could go to do their art, free of charge, with their kids in tow and the fact that they were mothers wouldn’t be an issue. That was really my main initial inspiration. I’ve been inspired by a lot of other things along the way.
RM: So what is the mission of Artsy Mamas?
MJ: Our goal is to encourage, empower, and educate moms through the arts. In order to improve mother self-esteem and therefore basically improve the lives of their children and their community around them.
RM: When I was in school, I remember hearing a lot about funding for the arts and through the way in which outlets for creativity and artistic expression were being left out of a lot of educational environments. There were a lot of voices out there calling for a recommitment to the Arts. Mandy, why do you feel that artistic expression is so important?
MJ: I think that when you’re an artist, and you don’t have an opportunity to express yourself artistically, something inside of you dies. I know that when I’m not doing something creative in my life, then I feel as if part of me is missing, like maybe my arm has been cut off or something. I think that that is an experience that everyone—whether they consider themselves to be an artist or not—can appreciate. I believe that it is absolutely necessary to have an outlet for your creativity in order to feel complete and whole.
RM: So how has having a creative outlet or a place to express yourself contributed to your mothering experience?
MJ: It has been wonderful, because first and foremost I have felt better about myself and felt like I have continued to be who I am outside of just being a wife and a mother. I think that that is very important, as far as being a good influence on my children, because I want them to grow up knowing that their mother was not just Hunter and Ronan’s mom but she was also an actor and an artist and a variety of other things.
RM: So what about some of the other moms that you’ve come in contact with? What difference has being part of Artsy Mamas made in their lives?
MJ: One thing that I have heard quite frequently is—that we’ve all had in common—is that we’ve had a hard time fitting in with other moms because, as creative, unique, oftentimes eccentric personalities, we’ve had a hard time fitting in with just the typical soccer mom that you might find around here. Being able to unite and come together to work towards a goal has helped other moms feel as if they have found—I don’t know, I’ve even heard “soul mates” tossed around a few times, but we’ve certainly felt as if we’ve encountered kindred spirits with one another and we felt a deep bond and found that we’re creating friendships that will last forever.
RM: Well I tend to think that creativity is very important. Not only does creativity often lead to world-changing innovation, but practically speaking, I’ve seen how important creativity can be when it comes to keeping a rambunctious toddler busy! I’m sure that many moms listening to the show today are eager to learn about Artsy Mamas and the sorts of activities that you offer. Can you tell us a little bit about the types of projects that you organize?
MJ: Yes! First of all, we have play dates. That just involves bringing your kids together for a typical play date like you would with any other mom’s group, but the difference is that we always incorporate some sort of artistic activity. We’ve enjoyed making Father’s Day cards together, and we’ve done painting and beading—then there’s a whole lot of other things on the agenda for the next month like bubble painting, and art with pumpkins. I’m not even really sure what that’s going to be—somebody else is planning that—but I’m sure it’s going to be really fun and the kids seem to really enjoy it.
We also are bartering our talents with one another, where we will be teaching one another different art by having mom-led workshops. It’s really cool because nobody has to pay tuition; they don’t have to find a babysitter that they’d have to pay for because it’s usually at night or on a weekend. They can usually find Dad or Grandma or something and they don’t have to pay any class fee other than if it’s like a supply fee involved.
Our biggest thing right now is the outreach program that we have started. We are teaming up with the Murfreesboro city schools here locally, and we are bringing arts into a preschool that is located in our inner city. The moms in our community are welcome to come to this parenting center that has opened up and do these different Artsy Mamas classes with us, and that will also be free of charge!
RM: That’s awesome! What about the different types of art? Within Artsy Mamas, are there visual artists, performing artists—what are some of the artistic orientations that people have?
MJ: As far as that goes, we have everything covered. Anything that is considered creative is totally welcome and we are open to anything.
For instance, we’ve had a creative writing workshop, we’re about to have a stained glass and hemp jewelry making coming up; there’s knitting this Saturday. We’ve got everything under the sun imaginable that one of the moms has jumped forward and said, “Yes, I would love to teach everybody to do this!” or “I would love to come into the parenting center and help out by leading a workshop on painting or collage making,” for instance. It’s been really wonderful to have the opportunity to start learning some of these things that I’ve always wanted to learn, but never had the money or time to do.
RM: So how does one become a part of Artsy Mamas?
MJ: Well, if you are local, then that’s pretty easy. But we are encouraging people from all over the country to team up with us and find out what we’re doing. They can check out our website, which is www.theartsymamas.com, and they can come over to our forum by clicking the word ‘Forum’ which will be over to the left on our homepage, and sign up and come on and start chatting with us. They can also find us on our MySpace by looking up our name, Artsy Mamas, and friend-ing us there if they happen to have a MySpace account. So there are a variety of different ways to hook up with us through the Internet and get on our mailing list and start to find out more about what we’re doing and learning what we’re doing in the future, which is going to be enormous!
RM: Can moms who live outside of the Murfreesboro area start a chapter of Artsy Mamas in their area?
MJ: That is something we are definitely looking to encourage.
RM: To learn more about Artsy Mamas and how you can get involved, check out the Artsy Mamas website, which is again theartsymamas.com. Mandy, thank you for joining me today on The Radio Mom Show and for sharing your story!
MJ: Thank you so much!
Unassisted Childbirth: DIY Delivery?
Joining me this week is Christy Callahan-Shearer from Atlanta, Georgia. Christy is a prenatal coach specializing in helping families have the birth experience they desire. She is going to be talking to us today about unassisted childbirth. This is delivering your baby yourself. I’m sure that a lot of you are already familiar with unassisted childbirth, but I have to tell you that I had never really thought about it. She will be telling us today about her birth experience and how prenatal coaching can help you if you are choosing to have an unassisted childbirth.
She is a mom of two and she is here to tell us all about prenatal coaching and unassisted childbirth. Hi Christy! Welcome.
CCS: Hi Kemi. Thanks for having me.
RM: Now, Christy, what exactly is prenatal coaching? What do you do?
CCS: Prenatal coaching is a way for a woman or a couple who are getting ready to conceive or give birth to a child to have some gentile support to guide them through that process.
RM: How did you begin thinking about having an unassisted childbirth?
CCS: Really in my pregnancy with Lucas, I went from a shift of, “Babies are born in the hospital; that is just what you do”, I had an HMO and we were going to go in and do the hospital thing. After taking a childbirth education class and visiting the hospital, I didn’t really think that was going to work out the way I wanted it to. I didn’t want to have to fight to get the kind of experience I wanted.
Someone else in our childbirth class said, “I’m in the same situation. I don’t want to give birth in an HMO hospital. We are hiring a local midwife.” I was like, “If they can do it, I can do it too.” So I interviewed this midwife and it was a good fit for us, so we went ahead with the home birth. It was kind of the idea, if this other couple could do it, so could we.
Having forgotten that my mother was born at home—so was her older brother and younger sister—that was just what people did. On a farm with a country doctor, and the Amish have their babies at home 99% of the time. It is just, in those cultures, it’s normal; it is just what you do. I had just kind of forgotten that part of my past. I knew that I wanted a natural birth, and so did my mom—it’s not what ended up happening for her, but that was her intention. I did some research on the web to find out more about home birth and read a lot. I was really fascinated, already at that point, I was a birth junkie, even though I didn’t know what that was.
RM: I was on a birth junkie’s website the other day.
CCS: Oh, the birth junkie? One of the website’s I came across was Laura Shanley’s website on unassisted childbirth. She was really a pioneer. There were some others—Marilyn Moran, Pat Carter—and I got the idea in my head, the seed was planted where I thought, “Wait a minute, I read about all these stories about these women doing birth just very organically and naturally and privately. Why can’t I do that? Why am I hiring a midwife to do this?”
At the time, it wasn’t the right time or right situation for it to happen. I learned a lot from having the experience of having a midwife and I am grateful to her because she really served as a model to me that birth is natural and normal and not a medical crisis, but a highly-spiritual and miraculous event that you go through, but not something to be scared about.
She herself had her first baby at home and with her second it was like three pushes on the kitchen floor and there the baby was. She was just with her and her husband. I was like, “Wait a minute, I can do that.” So I learned a lot about tuning into myself through that first birth. For me personally, it is really easier for me to just have my own timing and not be worried about when do I call her? Is she coming? Is she on her way?
With my first birth, I was having to start to push before she go there. I didn’t realize that that was what it was. I thought I had to go to the bathroom. I didn’t know that I could just push this baby when I feel it’s time. So I waited for her to get there, and that is when I started pushing. It came to a certain point when I got really distracted by the counting and I felt like I was supposed to be in a certain position—what was easier for the birth attendant—and even though there was a lot of support and a hands-off approach, I got distracted and was not able to tune into myself as much as I was able to in my second birth because there was that outside presence.
At a certain point after having pushed and exhausted myself, actually the midwife offered to cut a small little episiotomy to help and that didn’t help. I realized that I really needed to tune in inside and a voice told me I needed to get up off the sideline position and within two pushes, Lucas’ head popped out and with the next push his body popped out.
RM: Wow.
CCS: So for every woman, wherever you give birth, whether it is in the hospital, if that is where you feel safer, or with a midwife at home or by yourself, there is that point where there is a voice inside you that will guide you.
RM: We have moms tuning in from around the world, and I’m sure that some moms are coming from cultures where unassisted childbirth is the normal process, that is what everyone does. For those moms for whom this may be brand new and the idea of delivering your own baby just maybe never crossed their minds, I’m sure they have a couple of questions. Those I’m going to ask you about. Logistically, how do you prepare for a delivery? Are there certain supplies you need to have? Are there mental preparations you need to do? I know that you are a prenatal coach. Talk to me about the process that you need to do to deliver your own baby.
CCS: That is a simple question, long answer. Simply put, the biggest preparation involved in this kind of birth is mental. It is making a mental shift to believing that it is possible. Like crossing over a barrier, a fence, from one side to the other side. It sounds simple, yet it is a complex process. It is really about having faith in the unseen.
RM: Talk to me about your faith. You know I have a real interest in the relationship between faith, spirituality, and parenting practices. How has your faith impacted your birth choices?
CCS: Absolutely. I believe that we can tune into—like I was saying about my first birth—that inner voice and when we tune into that, that is what is really a big factor in this kind of birthing. Everybody who has this kind of birth, whatever kind of religious faith they are from, whatever background, a common thread is believing in the unseen and believing that the power that created the process of birth brings you safely through it. Giving birth is designed in such a way that given privacy and support and love, the body knows what to do.
As far as the preparation and faith part of it, it is tapping into that spiritual side of you through prayer, meditation, whatever is important to you, to get in touch with that side. Instead of seeing the world through more of a physical way, you see it through more of a spiritual lens. So that is a big part of the preparation.
As far as what kind of supplies to have, that is really up to the family as to what you feel like you need. Some people want to have an oxygen tank there, they feel more comfortable having more supplies like that. Really, in an emergency, people have babies in a taxi and stuff like that; you need a soft, clean place that is warm. It’s not really that complicated.
I got a lot of information off the web. I joined a Yahoo! group that gave me more information. Having had a home birth with a midwife, I had a supply list and I would happy to assist your listeners if they would like to write me at my website, www.prenatalcoaching.com, I would be happy to direct them to that information and I would love to support families who want to have this kind of birth but are kind of unsure, they want more support.
This is really what I am passionate about. I love babies and I believe that when we can give them this kind of beginning, which is really a gentile, loving start, and also one that helps mom and dad bond with each other, that they are just so happy and so loved and it is a great way to begin life.
RM: Christy, let’s talk a little bit about your prenatal coaching objectives. What do you find are maybe some of the things that families really need to help prepare for before they bring the baby into the world? What are some of the common issues that you find families working through?
CCS: That’s great. Some issues are different between moms and dads because we are kind of wired differently. A lot of what I hear is that a lot of people are worried about money and can we afford to have a baby? Are we at the point in our careers where we can have a baby?
Part of making that shift that I have been talking about—the spiritual shift from looking at the material to looking at the unseen—is trusting in financial provision and that there is enough to go around. There are plenty of resources on the planet and the same God who created the world also provides for us financially and materially. That’s another shift to lead parents through.
There are other fears that other people have depending on their particular situation. Some people have had difficult births and so when they think of giving birth or being there with their partner giving birth, some of those fears can come up. That can vary for each individual, so I would work with people on a one-on-one basis to really help them create a new belief around birth, that it is normal and safe and natural.
RM: What would you say, for example, to a mom who may have had maybe a difficult birth experience? Let’s just say a mom had had a breech birth. How would you help to walk that mother through the process of saying, you know what, I can actually deliver my baby at home?
CCS: Let’s talk about breech for example, then we’ll talk about let’s say a traumatic birth experience. I will separate those two and talk about the breech first.
Really, a breech baby, a baby that is born butt-first instead of head-first, it’s really just a variation of normal. It’s like some people are left handed and some people are right handed. Our world is kind of more geared toward right-handed people, but being left handed is okay too. It’s just a little different. A baby who is breech, you can say to the baby, “It would be easier if you were born with your head first, so if you would like to turn, that would really help things.” If the baby doesn’t want to turn, then you say, “Okay, then we are just going to do it this way.”
The main thing for a breech delivery is just to be relaxed and let the body do its thing and have the woman in an upright position. Women who have unassisted births, and Laura Shanley tells the story on her website, she had a dream about her baby in that position and what position to be in when she gave birth. It worked out beautifully. It’s kind of like changing our mindset about birth—that it really is normal. If there are slight variations, it’s okay and you just go with it, and your instincts will tell you what to do.
If a woman has had a birth which wasn’t what she’d hoped for and wasn’t ideal and there are feelings of disappointment, anger, even rage, or if it turns into depression—it’s like anger turned inward—it is ideal to work through that experience before having a next baby. That is what I like to help people do as well—to process the birth and to gain peace about it so that you’re not carrying those feelings into the next birth experience.
RM: What sorts of services do you offer at prenatalcoaching.com?
CCS: The services I offer range from free information on the website—you can request a report titled “Overcoming the Seven Obstacles to a Satisfying Birth” and I am happy to send that out to anyone who is interested in it—I also offer free tele-classes for folks who are interested in different topics of natural parenting. Those are free tele-classes. I also have tele-groups for moms as well as birth professionals, where you can call in and get support from other people. I coach those groups. I also work with couples and families one on one by phone. It is very convenient wherever you happen to be. You phone in and also receive support by email. I really start with where a person is and work toward where they want to be.
RM: So wherever you are, even if you have yet to conceive, it’s not too early for a prenatal coach, right?
CCS: Absolutely! I say the earlier you start the better. Laura Huxley, the widow of Aldous Huxley, says that two years before conception is the ideal time to start preparing. Not all of us get this information that early. With my first, I didn’t know as much as I know now. You start wherever you are and that’s okay, that’s exactly where you need to be. If you are already pregnant that’s fine, if you have yet to conceive, that’s great. Everyone who has worked with me who was preparing to have a baby ended up getting pregnant. I need to put that warning on my website: Caution: Use of This Service May Result in Pregnancy.